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Re: marriage
 black_squirrel
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Joined: 19 Apr 2011
Posts: 2619
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April_Lady wrote:
dolphin_lives wrote:
if you were a hard core christian, and you dating a person for a really long time, religion never was an issue, you knew she/he was an atheist, and she knew you were a christian, yet your beliefs never were a problem, then when proposed to, would you say yes or would you say sorry i can not marry you because you are an atheist.


A friend of mine was orthodox, and her boyfriend was catholic and from a very hard core christian family (haha nice definition! Laughing ). His parents wanted her to convert and insisted so much about this that all ended up with a civil marriage in our town hall. Laughing


Just the fact that a couple respects each other beliefs may not be enough for the marriage to survive. There may
be pressure from the extended family to convert the spouse. So for the marriage to work, the couple has
to stand up to the extended family. In the situation you mentioned, they did, so I think their marriage has a chance...
Good luck to both of them.
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 ThaFreeWorld
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Joined: 11 Apr 2011
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My father is more or less atheist and my mother is Catholic, and they get along just fine Óñìèõâàíå :)
I think the big thing is that they made their compromises before hand on how they were going to live with these differences. For example my household growing up always had a crucifix hanging somewhere, a couple of bibles readily available to sit down and read, etc, and my mother would periodically attend church. Whereas my father simply accepted these things but chose not to partake in them. I wasn't raised religiously but the resources were there from my mother if I were so inclined to learn more about it, or I could ask my father for his realist opinion. They both have their own beliefs but everything was left open because family and love were more important than personal religious beliefs.

Edit: I should add though that I would personally find it difficult to marry someone without the same ideals I have. I personally would be open minded to it, but I'd be concerned that someone would let their own faith get in front of seeing me for who I am, as an atheist.


Last edited by  ThaFreeWorld on Thu May 03, 2012 9:42 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: marriage
 hollycarole92
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Joined: 01 Feb 2012
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dolphin_lives wrote:
if you were a hard core christian, and you dating a person for a really long time, religion never was an issue, you knew she/he was an atheist, and she knew you were a christian, yet your beliefs never were a problem, then when proposed to, would you say yes or would you say sorry i can not marry you because you are an atheist.


Personally, I wouldn't date an atheist, just because spirituality is something I look for when looking for someone to date. Not because I'm biased, but because that's my preference, like how I prefer Caucasian or Latino men over African or Asian men, or how I don't want to date someone without a good sense of humor.
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Re: marriage
 Paranomasia
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Joined: 08 May 2011
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Marriage is a pretty lousy thing no matter what you believe.

hollycarole92 wrote:
Personally, I wouldn't date an atheist, just because spirituality is something I look for when looking for someone to date. Not because I'm biased, but because that's my preference, like how I prefer Caucasian or Latino men over African or Asian men, or how I don't want to date someone without a good sense of humor.


Spirituality is not an exclusive trait of the religious. Not believing in the Abrahamic god does not mean that a person cannot be spiritual about certain things, they simply wouldn't claim the properties of the spiritual notions to belong to or derive from a supernatural entity.
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Re: marriage
 hollycarole92
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Emperor_Godmode wrote:
Marriage is a pretty lousy thing no matter what you believe.

hollycarole92 wrote:
Personally, I wouldn't date an atheist, just because spirituality is something I look for when looking for someone to date. Not because I'm biased, but because that's my preference, like how I prefer Caucasian or Latino men over African or Asian men, or how I don't want to date someone without a good sense of humor.


Spirituality is not an exclusive trait of the religious. Not believing in the Abrahamic god does not mean that a person cannot be spiritual about certain things, they simply wouldn't claim the properties of the spiritual notions to belong to or derive from a supernatural entity.


Have you ever met an atheist who believes in a higher spiritual entity? Because I haven't. I've always understood it that atheists reject the belief of ANY higher spiritual being, including all gods, not just the Abrahamic god.
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Re: marriage
 Aristostomias
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hollycarole92 wrote:
Emperor_Godmode wrote:
Marriage is a pretty lousy thing no matter what you believe.

hollycarole92 wrote:
Personally, I wouldn't date an atheist, just because spirituality is something I look for when looking for someone to date. Not because I'm biased, but because that's my preference, like how I prefer Caucasian or Latino men over African or Asian men, or how I don't want to date someone without a good sense of humor.


Spirituality is not an exclusive trait of the religious. Not believing in the Abrahamic god does not mean that a person cannot be spiritual about certain things, they simply wouldn't claim the properties of the spiritual notions to belong to or derive from a supernatural entity.


Have you ever met an atheist who believes in a higher spiritual entity? Because I haven't. I've always understood it that atheists reject the belief of ANY higher spiritual being, including all gods, not just the Abrahamic god.

The Jedi. Ðàçñìèâàíå :D Well, I haven't a met a Jedi; doesn't mean that someone doesn't believe in that sort non-personal woo. Really, it's a common misconception that atheists believe things they have evidence for, but really the reasons an atheist can have for rejecting the god hypothesis can be rational -- or not. And that's why an atheist can be spiritual.

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Re: marriage
 black_squirrel
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Joined: 19 Apr 2011
Posts: 2619
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hollycarole92 wrote:
Emperor_Godmode wrote:
Marriage is a pretty lousy thing no matter what you believe.

hollycarole92 wrote:
Personally, I wouldn't date an atheist, just because spirituality is something I look for when looking for someone to date. Not because I'm biased, but because that's my preference, like how I prefer Caucasian or Latino men over African or Asian men, or how I don't want to date someone without a good sense of humor.


Spirituality is not an exclusive trait of the religious. Not believing in the Abrahamic god does not mean that a person cannot be spiritual about certain things, they simply wouldn't claim the properties of the spiritual notions to belong to or derive from a supernatural entity.


Have you ever met an atheist who believes in a higher spiritual entity? Because I haven't. I've always understood it that atheists reject the belief of ANY higher spiritual being, including all gods, not just the Abrahamic god.


Atheist can feel connected to other human. They can feel part of a world community, and part of nature and derive high
moral standards from that. That would be atheist spirituality.
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 hollycarole92
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Okay, everyone, maybe I didn't use the correct word when I said "spiritual." Óñìèõâàíå :) I see what you all mean now. I guess what I mean is "believing in a higher, omniscient power and practicing some sort of faith to go with it."
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 ChrisShiva
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Benchmark234 wrote:
ChrisShiva wrote:
I'm an atheist married to a Catholic and it doesn't really cause problems for us. But this is because we have mutual respect for each other beliefs.

If she was some religious fundamentalist always pressuring me to accept Jesus as my Savior or I was always criticizing her for believing in God than it would definitely hurt our marriage.


Didn't you mention before that your wife was Catholic pretty much in name only though? Correct me if I'm wrong


Well that's a hard one to answer. She doesn't go to church or do many of the other things that a practicing Catholic would do. But she believes in God, Jesus and the basic tenets of the faith. However, she also sees many religious people as being hypocritical and many priests, bishops, etc as being corrupt.

If you were to ask her she would definitely still identify as Catholic but one with an independent mind who doesn't see the daily practice of religion as something that is necessary.
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Re: marriage
 Catmania
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Joined: 19 Jul 2011
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hollycarole92 wrote:
dolphin_lives wrote:
if you were a hard core christian, and you dating a person for a really long time, religion never was an issue, you knew she/he was an atheist, and she knew you were a christian, yet your beliefs never were a problem, then when proposed to, would you say yes or would you say sorry i can not marry you because you are an atheist.


Personally, I wouldn't date an atheist, just because spirituality is something I look for when looking for someone to date. Not because I'm biased, but because that's my preference, like how I prefer Caucasian or Latino men over African or Asian men, or how I don't want to date someone without a good sense of humor.


I wouldn't personally mind. More attention I'd pay to other qualities rather than a belief (apartf from fanatics who I'd not even start dating)

Ðàçñìèâàíå :D Atheists usualy have a good sense of humour (not all of them though) so why not try dating one? Razz

overly religious people lack humour as a rule and are fanatical in their views so I'd never choose someone too much devoted to a religion. But no problem with those who just believe in God and so on.
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