I'm a plethora of things--good​ and bad.  I'll deny all of the bad stuff, but it'll come out about a week into knowing me.  That's the way it usually goes, anyhow.

I have a pretty professional​ methodical day job, but afterwards, I'm all of the following:

Guitarist, photographer​, artist...

Horribly in love with the British culture (yes...I know there's more to Great Britain than London...Oy!​  You guys are indeed Great!)

Before you ask, please assume the following:
Like David Bowie, I'm afraid of Americans.
My webcam's broken, and I don't want to see you on yours.
I don't want to know what "our"​ children will look like.  Scary!!

Absolutely no one younger than 20 years old.  Sorry kids.  That's just the way it is.

Also, no more messages from people who are too lazy to upload a photo of themselves.  Really. Come on, now.  If you can't hit "Scan.  Save.  Upload.  Save." then how can you ever type several messages in succession?   *Rolls eyes*

I'd love to hear from almost anyone else.   If I started listing restrictions​ here, then someone's going to get offended, and I won't have any letters to delete. Hahaha. 

Just assume that I'm too stingy to give money, and that the US is so full of people that I'm not allowed to invite anyone to come live here.   I'll only accept marriage proposals from Kings.  No Princes. Sorry.  If we're going to be absurd, here, then let's just shoot for the top.

Si tu parles Français, écrives-moi en Français.   Je voudrais parler avec quelqu'un qui parle la langue régulièremen​t.

The usual stereotypica​l left-handed-​person stuff:  music, reading, writing, photography,​ watching movies that will never be nominated for Oscar awards (thank gawd, because heaven knows I'm awfully sick of movies with slow-motion scenes of people running, crying, laughing, or dancing)

the Beatles, the Who, Dave Clark Five, Travis, the Raveonettes,​ Franz Ferdinand, Muse, Nirvana, the Smashing Pumpkins, REM, Kaiser Chiefs, Maximo Park, Embrace, Oasis, Blur, the Cranberries,​ Foo Fighters, Hole, Weezer, White Zombie, Rob Zombie, Marilyn Manson, John Lennon, Live, Matchbox 20, NIN, Orgy, Our Lady Peace, Rage Against the Machine [for that militant poetry, hahaha], Soundgarden,​ the Cherry Poppin' Daddies,  Badly Drawn Boy, Bloc Party, Artic Monkeys [who the f*ck are they?], Boy Kill Boy, Everclear, etc...

Led Zepplin's OK...but a bit overrated like the Stones....

I wouldn't judge me by this list....
(I'll be sure to put a good mix of my favorites so that I'm not deemed All-Encompas​sing-Strange​)

Halloween (only the greatest movie of all time)
Batman (w/Adam West)[Is there anyone in the world that didn't go ape-sh*t when he pulled out the shark repellant?]
Batman (w/Michael Keaton) [I love how dark this movie was.  Awesome.]
Friday the 13th (Part 3D) [If the special effects were any cheaper, they would have been for free.]
Life as a House [Regular tear jerker]
PI (3.14159....​.) [This is only for intelligent folks.]
Home Alone 2 [old school funny]
Scream [return of the cut-em-up flicks]
Mystic River
Shaun of the Dead [Simon Pegg is just phenomenal]
Hot Fuzz [Peas and Rice!!!]
About a Boy
Love Actually
The Godfather
White Noise
Nightmare on Elm Street
any bad slasher flick

I'm holding my breath and waiting for either the American television writers to go back on strike, or for California to break off and sink into the ocean.  Either would make life worth living again.


I'm into the true crime stuff and Brit-Tele.


Wire in the Blood
Murphy's Law
Hollyoaks (yeah, yeah...it's addictive)
Forensic Files
Cold Case Files
Murder by the Book

As for my favorite books?  Well... 

I'd like to choose some profound book that just blows your mind...kind of like, "Gone with the Wind," but I'm just not that type of gal. 

I read complete and utter crapola.  You know, those books where someone gets killed in the first 50 pages, and the last 375 pages are spent developing characters, a 20 minute sex affair, and then eventually uncovering the killer's identity along with something 'interesting​' about the main character's past.  It's all the same with different names, and at the end of each book, I say something stupid like, "Wow.  I never saw that one coming."​

My favorite authors are J. Grisham, H. Coben, P. Cornwell, J. Picoult, D. Lehane, J. Saul, J. Kellerman, M.H. Clark...you get the gist. 

Like I said...compl​ete and utter crapola with no literary value whatsoever.  I think the most profound book I've ever enjoyed was Dr. Seuss's "Oh, the Places You Will Go."  Don' t knock it til you've read it.

Evil always wins because good is stupid.

"This is going nowhere!"​
"B****,​ where the f*** was it supposed to go?"

"She has it like that?"
"She HAD it like that."

That's a little excessive.

One little sausage sizzling in a pan.  All of a sudden, one went, "BAAAAAAM!!!!!!"​
I'm still baffled on this.  Did the sausage explode?  Did it scream, "BAAAAAAM!!"​ What happened?  Was there a thorough investigatio​n as to the current whereabouts of the sausage.  I'm perplexed.


11-70 is my flight number!  How can I arrive at 11:70??

I'm not going to eat more than what's available.

Next...on Sick Sad World.

You got red on you.

You get more with a kind word and a gun than you do with a kind word alone.

This town needs an enema!

Where Does he get those wonderful toys??

And the mutt can bring his big dog along, too.

To be sure; to be sure.

I'm mortified at the type of attention this thing is attracting to me.